just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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