i barfeds in our rink
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
