dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
