You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
