if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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