I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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