So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize
