I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
