youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
