Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
