what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
