I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize