This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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