i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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