after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
