it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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