I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize