i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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