Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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