so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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