Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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