Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
There r osticjed everywhere
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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