Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
