Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
