okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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