Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
