Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
