imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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