You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
the night ended with taco bell and tears
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize