Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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