The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
