hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
no you cant smoke seaweed
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
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