Why are handjobs necessary in class?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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