Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize