So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
