South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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