More tranny stories later!
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
