how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize