At least make sure they are 18
Why
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
