The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We left the knife in your bed.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
