we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize