when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
