I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
