we have pet lesbian snakes
If that was your dad, he is hot
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
