Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
