put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
