I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
