Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
the day after is always just damage control
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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