Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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