Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
