If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize