Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize